FUPPPS UP Editorial:  Critters Cry Out for Gay NIPtuals at Democratic Convention


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 CRITTERS CRY OUT FOR GAY NIPTUALS

 

 

Boston, MA, July 27, 2004:  Thousands of ducks, pigeons, cats, dogs and raccoons lined up outside Democratic Headquarters to pet-ition the delegates and the presumptive presidential candidate, John Kerry, to protect their right to wed as same sex couples.

 

A cacophony of sound erupted as the quacks, barks, meows and hisses trumpeted in unison.  When the huge tumult finally quieted to a dull roar, a translator relayed over a microphone the demonstrators' message: "Let our kind get hitched!" 

 

Martha and Susan Racketicoon summed up the mood:  "We're fed up but we're not gonna take it anymore!"  When asked what they meant, Martha explained, "We get all these loaves of bread and dog food from the people whose homes we visit, but they're not supporting us in the same sex NIPtual issue!  We can't understand why, since they're also complaining about how many more of our mouths they have to feed.  What's wrong with humans, anyway?"  A good question, Martha.   

 

As we said in our last editorial, Scary, Scary Times, it's imperative that we all get out and tell friends to join the fight.  Let your local and national representatives know you care about the rights of same sex critters to wed. 

 

And again as we said before, we're not gonna tell you how to vote. That's your choice.  But if you care about rights such as same sex marriage for all, regardless of species or gender, then we strongly urge you, get out and vote in November!  And tell all your friends how important it is that their bark be heard!

 

  

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