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Welcome to the FUPPPS Editorial Archives, where our databank lets you review all the opinions fit to bark on the critical issue of same sex NIPtuals for the furry, feathered and slithery among us! 


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Now the Going's Gonna get Ruff!

 

March 3, 2004, Van Nuys, CA:  Well, folks it's been nip and tuck, but today we officially have one Democratic candidate, one resprouted Green and the Republican incumbent in the 2004 presidential race. 

 

We've been warned that the litter is really going to hit the fan now.

 

It's time for us FUPPPSTERS to redouble our efforts.  We simply must protect the rights of our pets to indulge in same sex marriage, just as humans are winning! 

 

After all, what's with this argument that sex is only for procreation, among pets and humans alike?  Aside from the considerations of capering about for reasons of entertainment, we ask you, aren't the enormous number of paw prints from the 2-legged furless today causing a lot of the destruction on our planet? 

 

And overpopulation problems apply just as much to our pets!  We all know how important it is to promote birth control among our dear friends to protect the unwanted from being abused.  Wouldn't giving sanctity to same sex NIPtuals be a wonderful help?

 

Let's boot out insensitivity to the sexual needs of our 4- to 100-legged friends.  If they want to mate with those of their own sex, we say nip, nip, hoorah!
 

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